Spinsterella

Friday, November 30, 2007

Heartfelt Post Thankfully Avoided

I was in bed the other night, crying, and I couldn't get back to sleep, what with the crying, and I almost got up and blogged what I was thinking.

Jesus.

I fell back to sleep eventually. But what did you miss? Something like this:

  • Why am I crying all the time?
  • Jesus, the last decent night's sleep I had was at Reading. What manner of loon goes to the world's most horrible rock festival to sleep?
  • I am very close to stabbing my boss.
  • And his cunting minions.
  • 70 hour week = too much. I'm not being unreasonable, am I?
  • I think my job might be making me ill.
  • I JUST NEED SOME SLEEP.
  • And time. Time off.
  • Driving on the M25, fantasising about being involved in a hideous road accident, just so I can have a couple of days off work. Is this normal?
  • I can't remember the last time I even listened to the fucking radio.

Phew.

Thnk fuck I didn't post all of that, eh?

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20 Comments:

  • wow, no kidding. way too crunchy. best thing to do is pretend that nothing's wrong. once your psyche crumbles under the strain you can start drinking heavily and go round shout at newspaper boxes. people will give you money and various charities will provide you with clothes,food, housing and medical care.

    ((())), my darling.

    By Blogger FirstNations, at 10:01 PM  

  • ...pretend that nothing's wrong...

    ooh, I've recently moved on to this stage, funnily enough.

    I'm hoping that I'll remember to kill my toad of a deputy boss before they cart me off. Bit of a waste otherwise.

    Ooooo - do they have books in th loony bin? I've slacked right off with that Pynchon.

    I'm OK really. Some of my colleagues having been living like this for years.

    By Blogger Spinsterella, at 10:13 PM  

  • living like that for years? more fool them. throw a conspicuous wobbly in your boss' vicinity and earn yourself some much needed time off. chase boys, drink tea, watch telly, sleep in, f*ck work. they'll manage without you for a while.

    By Blogger Rosie, at 11:16 PM  

  • If it's not your vocation or you're not being paid weekly in chests overflowing with gold then I think you should try your best to tell them/him/her to stick a 70 hour week up their/his/her arse.
    Good luck 'gel.

    By Blogger Arabella, at 11:34 PM  

  • Uh oh. I remember feeling like that a couple of years ago... I was so over-worked I started getting back pain. It was so bad that in the middle of the night I convinced myself I had a ruptured kidney. I don't even know what a "ruptured kidney" is, or if it even exists, but it was enough to set off a mild panic attack. I think I was just tired.

    Take a couple of sick-days off, have a big fat lie in, and do some swimming.

    By Blogger Annie Rhiannon, at 11:57 PM  

  • I know how you feel. Sometimes I wish for an earthquake to strike just so I don't have to go to work. Not that I don't like my job(s), I do, but there's too much of it/many of them.

    By Blogger Timorous Beastie, at 8:06 AM  

  • He has minions to do his cunting for him?

    By Blogger Tim Footman, at 10:39 AM  

  • Oh goodness! I think you really do need another job!

    By Blogger pink jellybaby, at 11:49 AM  

  • What Arabella said. The fact that a lot of your colleagues have been living like that for years should set the alarm bells ringing.

    By Blogger Betty, at 12:46 PM  

  • I'm sorry to say it, but I've heard nothing but horror stories about working in your particular sector* - high pressure, long hours, little reward other than a bit of prestige.

    Find something else. You will go nuts if you stay - no job's worth driving yourself to depression for.




    *Can't remember whether we're allowed to talk about your job in detail on here.

    By Blogger LC, at 1:08 PM  

  • Sounds painfully normal to me. I endorse what Annie said: take the sick days off sans automobile accident. You deserve a break.

    By Blogger Valerie, at 5:01 PM  

  • ...and another thing..

    I was at some Christmas markets with a friend yesterday and they were all selling bloody mirrors, so I kept getting glimpses of myself in daylight.

    I look like a walking-dead version of myself - dead skin, dull hair, jet-black undereye shadows that make me look like I've got a massive coke habit.

    Oddly, this has coincided with a dramatic upturn in male interest in me. Men, weird.

    Anyhow, I've cheered up now.

    And it's Sunday, so I've got work to do. Aarrrgh.

    By Blogger Spinsterella, at 12:17 PM  

  • Glad you've cheered up, but I still agree with Annie. Take some sick days and get yourself some pampering by Christmas.

    By Blogger red, at 2:26 PM  

  • Yep - I agree. I've been there - it's crap. I remember clearly judging whether if I walked out in front of the next car 'slightly' that it would sort of knock my knee but not so bad that I would be maimed but just enough to not go to work for ages. Then I had the epiphany moment. Why do that when you can just chuck a major sicky. Do it! I didn't and carried on and I ended up not being able to work from sheer exhaustion and genral feelings of worthlessness due to excessive tiredness. It's not worth it. Anyway - think of all the fabulous blogging and commenting you can do if you cut work for a bit ;-) Take good care x

    By Blogger rockmother, at 9:25 PM  

  • >>Some of my colleagues having been living like this for years>>

    Goodness, that's not good.

    Take a sick day. Drive somewhere so you can escape phone / email etc

    By Blogger Tabby Rabbit, at 1:28 AM  

  • I had one sick day (genuine) once. I came back to such a fucking hooha that I realised I could never be sick again.

    Will post something more cheerful soon, IF I EVER GET FIVE MINUTES.

    By Blogger Spinsterella, at 6:10 AM  

  • The answer is to take more than one day off...

    If you have one day off work will wait for you... "she'll be back tomorrow and will sort it out then", etc... (this tends to happen to me every time I have a day out of the office).

    If you have more than one day off, things will start to get sorted as all the essential stuff starts getting done by other people...

    The best thing to do is to make sure you're unambiguous about when you are going to be back so your boss type people have to actually do something as they can't plan for when you're going to be back!

    So take a few days off and don't worry about work, let them take care of it.

    By Blogger Delirium, at 10:50 PM  

  • This sounds kind of weird but the thought of you crying through the night makes me want to throw my arms around you and hold you close. You need looking after. So warm hugs from a distance.

    By Blogger Fidel, at 11:08 AM  

  • Sounds like stress to me. Are you trying to be an overachiever? Sometimes you need to have realistic goals.

    By Blogger llewtrah, at 12:44 PM  

  • I had a job like that once. After three years of 70-hour weeks I chucked it in and moved abroad to live on my wits.

    That was a terrible mistake as well, as it turned out, but at least I didn't have that dreadful job any more.

    By Blogger patroclus, at 6:36 PM  

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