Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Finally, A Post With Teeth

I don't have any fillings.

This is because when I was a wee girl, my Daddy wouldn't let me eat any sweets, apart from once a week at Irish Dancing classes when I'd have a 10p mix-up and a packet of 5p Meanies. I suffered years and years of trauma at school eating yoghurts and apples while everybody else gorged themselved on diluting orange and bars of chocolate and jelly tots, but I don't have any fillings.

I am extraordinarily, embarrassingly proud of this. I try to mention it to people within, ooh, about five minutes of meeting them.

It may be utterly tragic, but hey, I don't have a huge amount going for me, what with the raddled complexion (acne and psoriasis ffs), world-class split ends and glass-shattering accent. I did used to have a stupendous rack, but it just disappeared when I turned twenty-seven.

But I do have good teeth.

(I only posted all this so I could steal the
most brilliant post-title ever from Wyndham. Sorry Wyndham. Sorry everybody.)


  • what happened to your rack? Confused about how that could just disappear

    By Blogger GreatSheElephant, at 9:02 PM  

  • Yay! I don't have any fillings either (for the same reasons I suspect). I'm scared to go to the dentist now just in case my perfect record is spoilt.

    By Blogger Billy, at 9:58 PM  

  • Steal away, Spinny, I feel very honoured!

    By Blogger Wyndham, at 10:14 PM  

  • I overdosed on clove rock as a youth.

    The crunched sugar has left my mouth a graveyard punctuated with crowns, dental inlays, and will shortly (woe of woes, £1800)sport a fine pair of dental implants.

    The amount of money my molars have cost me would easily fund a hydro-electric project in Pakistan.

    Bastard clove rock.

    By Blogger garfer, at 10:35 PM  

  • maybe you just misplaced it (your rack)? have you tried looking behind the sofa?

    By Anonymous riddledwiththepox, at 11:04 PM  

  • I was kinda wondering about the rack, also. I mean, I thought if anything they got BIGGER.

    Anyway, Mazel tov! on the teeth!

    By Blogger Zen Wizard, at 11:07 PM  

  • btw - he might be a friend, but I maintain that the best blog title ever was:

    "The Curious Incident of the Blog in the Night-Time"


    and he's the person who first alerted me to this blog. so he's a good 'un.

    By Anonymous riddledwiththepox, at 11:09 PM  

  • Heh, I have fillings cause I like me sugar. The dentist who gave me the damn fillings didn't do it right, so my teeth still hurt if I eat anything sweeter than yoghurt, but it aint stopped me no sur. The only problem is I'm no longer on the NHS cause NZ aint a welfare state. The bastards.

    By Blogger No Shit Sherlock, at 11:12 PM  

  • I'm just pontificating here, but I believe that since the 70's in UK dental caries has become a thing of the past thanks to fluoride being added to municipal water. Gum disease and crooked teeth however are a different matter, our expections have risen concerning acceptable teeth - just look at the stars in the 30's and 40's films. Dentists need to make a living like everyone else.

    By Blogger hooklands, at 4:40 AM  

  • When I was a little girl I would steal the slice of lemon from my mother's gin and suck on it.

    Considering the amount of gin my mother drinks, my teeth have suffered greatly.

    By Blogger Annie Rhiannon, at 10:12 AM  

  • I have no fillings either.

    Possibly because I havent been to the dentists since it stopped being free.

    By Blogger Fuckkit, at 12:14 PM  

  • i am happy for you. teeth are, you know, good.
    sorry about your rack, though. wtf?
    smile a lot and nobody will notice!

    i have straight teeth. thats the only good thing you can say about them.
    but i have a SPECTACULAR rack.

    By Blogger First Nations, at 4:27 PM  

  • My rack hasn't disappeared altogether, it's just not as terrifyingly out-of-proportion as it once was. I'll be doing a post about breasts some day when I get around to it.

    Riddled - so THATS who my mysterious Malawi person is!

    By Blogger Spinsterella, at 7:53 PM  

  • I have 20 crowns, 16 root canals and countless fillings. My teeth have always been a disaster zone. The NHS didn't help, but I have an orthodontist now, who planed my roots!

    By Blogger DavetheF, at 8:31 PM  

  • my rack's pathetic and my teeth are pretty crap too

    By Blogger GreatSheElephant, at 9:22 PM  

  • I don't have any fillings either! I do feel extrordinarily proud of the fact. My dentist said I was the "easiest check up he'd had all month" the last time I saw him. I walked about town with a huge grin on my face for the rest of the day.

    The strange thing is that I don't consiously take that good care of my teeth. It's not hereditary either. Every other family member has loads of fillings or false teeth.

    I guess it makes up for every other flaw I've inherited.

    I hope my parents never read that. I feel karma taking aim already.

    By Blogger Steve, at 9:44 PM  

  • Our family sort of forgot about dentristry for five years of my young life, even though one of my dad's closest friends was a dentist. Needless to say, it didn't bode well.

    By Blogger Michelle, at 3:44 AM  

  • I'd be very proud, too, if I had no fillings. Also, I wouldn't be concerned about getting those odd little electric shocks in my mouth when something metal comes into contact with the fillings. Ever since piercings became popular, the love-life has had that extra, unwanted edge.

    By Blogger Qenny, at 12:25 PM  

  • You do yourself a disservice Spin, your rack looked prety substantial from where I was standing.

    By Blogger LC, at 3:05 PM  

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